Monday, September 14, 2009

Tavern Tables: Meals from the Kitchen

Taking advantage of an opening left behind by a party of departing dwarves, you settle down at a scarred and ring-marked table. A moment later, a young serving wench, her brow and ringlet curls dabbed with sweat, sidles up to your table. With barely concealed impatience, she cocks her hand to her waist and briskly rattles off the kitchen menu from memory. What’ll it be?

Tavern Meal Table
1) Hunk of bread and a wedge of cheese
– course, black bread served with a wedge of sharp white cheese (5 cp).
2) Crawfish with rice and beans – fished from the stream just outside of town and served on a bed of wild rice and red beans (8 sp).
3) Dog-head soup – exactly what it sounds like. An acquired taste to say the least (2 cp).
4) Cottage pie – beef, carrots, green beans, and corn served with a mashed potato crust (5 sp).
5) Stuffed mushrooms – mushroom caps stuffed with sausage, onions, bell peppers, and cheese (10 cp).
6) Fruit – assorted types (apples, peaches, strawberries, cherries, blueberries, grapes, etc.) served in season (1 sp per piece or equivalent).
7) Mutton haunch – a steaming sheep’s haunch served with gravy and potatoes (15 sp).
8) Venison – roasted deer served with a green leaf salad and bread (6 sp).
9) Beef steaks – served bloody rare (15 sp).
10) Frog’s legs – caught in the swamp just down the road, breaded, and fried (1 sp).
11) Chicken and dumplings – cooked chicken breast, vegetables, and balls of dough served with sauce (5 sp).
12) Haggis – stuffed sheep’s stomach (5 sp).
13) Rabbit stew – a thick stew containing rabbit, onions, celery, carrots, potatoes, and mushrooms (3 sp).
14) Roast boar – local wild boar taken legally from a nearby forest (1 gp).
15) Giant crab legs – baked crab legs of the giant (and I mean giant, not just big) variety, trimmed down to fit in the oven (10 gp).
16) Lutefisk – dried cod soaked in cold water and lye, then cooked. Served with potatoes, peas, and bacon (4 sp).
17) Roasted fowl – game bird served with rice and seasonal vegetable (10 sp).
18) Perpetual stew – constantly simmering stew comprised of meat and vegetables. When the stock gets low, more of the same are thrown into the pot (2 sp).
19) Blood pudding – pig’s blood, fat, and barley cooked thick then cooled (5 sp).
20) Honeycomb – a piece of fresh comb dripping with honey (1 gp).


Jayson said...

Now I'm hungry again.

Anonymous said...

Does it come with the entire dog's head in the bowl? Because something tells me there is some value in buying 5 Dog's Head Soups instead of a single apple if you get to keep the commemorative skull and jawbone.

Anonymous said...

Also, is there a discount if you're willing to accept Dog's Butt Soup? Like, tenth bowl of Dog's Butt Soup is free?

I'm envisioning a horrible yet enthusiastic man holding a chewn wooden spoon in one hand and a grimy ticket with ten holes punched in the other.

Mister Scratch said...

Lutefisk also comes with butter, lots of butter.

Pukako said...

1d30 - careful with ordering dogs...

Alistair Bourdain once said that the worst thing he ever ate was unwashed warthog anus, so I'm not happy that was missed off the list.